You sound like you have been through a tough learning experience with the guy you thought would help you feel good about yourself and the world. You are definitely not crazy, and understandably you are a lot more cautious now about getting hurt in any way again, even with friends.
Life may seem difficult at times, and no doubt things happen to us and involving us that we prefer not to happen, but it is...
1. what we make these things mean, and... 2. what we focus upon in each moment that determines...
1. how we feel, and, 2. what we are telling the universe we desire to experience more of.
So, as strange as it may sound to feel better bit by bit each day, constantly think in each moment what you can notice about your reality and life that is positive and makes you feel a bit better.
Your emotions will tell you how good a job you are doing of focusing on things your soul really wants to experience.
Your emotions are your soul's guidance system through life.
Even in negative situations, such as your past romantic relationship experience, the positive you can focus upon is you are now 100% clear on one thing that you don't want in your next romance. This will make you feel a bit better and that is the only thing you can do, and the only thing you need to do in life.
Your life is for living each moment and deciding and focusing upon what you wish to experience more of. That is why you are here.
Focus on the warmth of your bed and ask for more of that. Focus on the clear sky and how nice it feels to feel the sun and ask for more of that. Focus on when you experience freedom, such as when you have a few hours to go shopping, and ask for more freedom. Focus on when you experience money coming into your life, even if it is just a few pounds and ask for more of that feeling of abundance. Focus on your health and ask for more health. Focus on connections you have with friends and ask for more positive intimacy.
Your life will change quickly when you choose each moment to learn about what it feels good for you to focus upon. Then you...
1. feel good 2. get to know who you are 3. have nice things happen to you
We are all vibrational beings and our emotions tell us how low or high we are vibrating. Whatever we are vibrating will attract more of the same.
Fear and anger primarily come from feeling helpless, vulnerable and not in control of your experience. By learning the above and seeing the only thing you can and need to control is what you focus upon, you now know how to have an excellent life and bit by bit the fear and anger will disappear.